KNightmare

17:28 12/12/2006

It all happened somewhere in the early mornings between 3 to 6, I would say. I was having a crazy nightmare about a haunted house - in no case, was there any monster that was roaming around in the house, rather the house keeps altering itself ala harry potter to strange dimensions; often leaving you in a sense of "whats next and whats where ?kinda feeling!".

-----------I give it to you as though I am a part of it--------

It was 3:30 in the evening. There I laid with my college and high school mixed crowd, in a medieval school like building. Kili bungalow, as they call it! has been handed over to the local Church of South India parish from the original Armenian brothers. The legal battle finally had its say and giving its due respect in its 200 years old ancestry they have handed it down to the Archbishop in a small community function yesterday. As a move to celebrate this, they have called in all the affiliates to hold an intra community festive. I somehow got myself into this celebration. The building has been decorated wonderfully but poorly maintained. One could see the shine of the red floor amidst the dirt sprayed all over it. The remains of the old antiques like photo frames, book shelves etc.were covered in a coat of spider web. The doom covering the hall had many intricate designs that set the light in a varying tone.

I was spending some time along with my friends in one of the least participated festive events preparation in one of the grand hall.The hall had a simple balcony made completely of timber with sodium vapor lights decorating it in a slight dim of ambience. Groups were mildly scattered all over the balcony. All of them were in semi-sleep mode positioning themselves at strange postures between themselves. It was a slow play that was rehearsed for the show to be set up tomorrow. A sense of drift made us to walk away from the area and explore more. Having walked out of the hall's balcony, I noticed that walls were not cemented but plastered rather. It was a indo-portuguese style of architecture. The material were local, but the elaborate designs were exotic. It suddenly grew spooky though, mainly because of the fading light and the echoing sounds of breeze inside the vacant area. I was lost in a moment of madness and absorption to the situation.

There was a chirp sound that was heard so ever as if it was the background of some stupid television serial. zzzzZZz. In a moment of hurry the sound grew heavy and in the process the wall gave way - leaving the way that leads to the balcony behind obstructed. In a sense of paranoic bursts inside the mind, Rakesh squeezed himself out through the diminishing stairs that leads to the floor above.Walking in the same stairs, we were struck inside to see that the stairs run directly to the ceiling floor bed.

We were so damn freaked out, the way back is completely out and the stairs now lead to the ceiling floor.
There was a huge ventilation fan that was hanging on one corner and quite frankly there was no way out. Chasing the fading light withstanding suffocation and drop in pressure we managed to rip open one of the fan's wings and reach ourselves out. Eventually we dropped on the terracotta slope over the ruined garden. We grappled ourselves to the nearest window and pushed ourselves in. Taking in heavy breaths we look up and wonder at a grand ball with people dancing slow music. Damn, we have traveled through time.

PAUSE

And there it ends for now.

TOTFL

TOTFL (Test of Tamil as a Foreign Language)?



Joot !



Questions:



1) What do you do with a Gujili?

a) Gujaals

b) Gilma

c) Gilpans

d) Galij



2) What is a Jujubi ?

a) Something sweet

b) An easy one

c) A tough one

d) An Alwaa



3) What is Alwaa?

a) Something you find in Tirunelveli

b) What a girlfriend gives when she marries someone else

c) A laddu

d) Jujubi



4) What is the respectful way to address a friend?

a) Machi

b) Sir

c) By name

d) Aiya



5) Who is a 'Frooti' ?

a) A studious person

b) A sportsman

c) The professor

d) A soft drink



6) When someone says 'nambitten', what do they mean?

a) I don't believe you!

b) Sure, I believe you

c) Are you nuts??

d) I have to catch a bus



7) Who or what is Peter?

a) A tourist

b) Someone who talks only in English

c) Peter Jones

d) Your teacher



8) For which of the following events will you say 'Gumbaloda Govinda'?

a) When you go to Tirupati as a group

b) When you do group studies

c) Meeting a Hindi actor



9) What is a 'rupture'?

a) Kadi

b) Draabai

c) Trouble

d) Danger



10) When Someone refering to a woman as 'Seriyana Kattai ' ?

a) she is genius

b) she is lean

c) she had looted all guys eyes...

d) she wears wooden chappals.



Check out the answers ..



Correct Answers:

1 - a

2 - b

3 - b

4 - a

5 - a

6 - a

7 - b

8 - b

9 - c

10 � c



If you have scored more than 7 marks , Kalakitta maams...

----------------------------------------------------------------------

You got failed ?..dont worry ..Refer the following Dictionary Of �Madras Tamilu� to pass in this TOTFL Exam...



Allwa - To cheat

Aatha - Mother

Abase - Loot adiththal

Alppam -A silly/cheap dude

Anna - The elder brother

Anni - Anna's figure

Appeettu - Unsuccessful

Asaththal - Kalakkal

Bajari - A not-so-friendly figure

Bandha - Pillim

Bekku - Fool

Body - Muscular Machi

Chithee - Aunty Figure

Dapsa/Doop - Lie

Desi Gujili - An Indian figure in US

Dhil - Courage

Dhool - Super

Dham - To smoke

Daavu - Site seeing

Dickielona - A friendly game played in Delhi (courtesy Movie: Gentleman)

Damaram - Deaf

Dori - Squint-eyed Figure

item - Young/Attractive Lady/Women/Girl

Freeyaavidu - Forget it

Gaali - Appeettu

Gujili - Figure

Guru - Head of the gang

Gujaals - Having fun with Gujilis

Gaanapaattu - Rap song sung by Machis

Galeej - Dirty

Gilli , Goli - Traditional games played in Madras

Goltti - A dude from Andhra

Jakku - An exclamation on seeing a not-so-Takkar figure (see Jil below)

Jollu - Bird watching

Jilpaans - Gujaals

Jute - Escape when caught up by girlfriend's father.

Jujubi - Easy

Jil - An exclamation on seeing a Takkar figure

Jalsa - Same as Gujaals

Kaattaan - Uncivilized/ Rude Machi

Kenai - Idiot

Kikku / Mabbu - Intoxicated/under influence

Kalakkalls - To cause a flutter

Kanai pakri - Friend of ushar pakri

Kindal - To make Fun

Kaka adikarathu - Putting soaps to someone

K M L - Kedacha Mattum Labam

Kutti - Figure

Kudumba figure - Homeloving Gujli

Kudumba paatu - A song with which machis identify themselves

Kulls - A short machi

Laddu - Allva

Loot adiththal - to steal

Maams - One cool dude

Maanga - Fool

Machi - Maams

Mandai - A sharp guy

Mary - feminine of Peter

Mavu - refer O B.

Nachunu - Bull's eye

Nambitten - I don't believe you

Naattu Kattai - A well-built village figure

Naattan - Villager

Naamam - To cheat

Naina - Father (courtesy Telugu)

Kadalai - Machi talking to a Gujili or vice versa

OB - To waste time

Ottal - To make fun of some one

Ondrai anna - Worthless

Pattaani - Machi talking to Machi or Gujli talking to Gujli

Peter Party- Machi trying to show off by talking in hi-fi english

Pathni - A figure who goes around the block

Pakkri - A shrewd dude

Petta - Area

Pisaaththu - Cheap

Pillim - Show-off

Peela - To lie

Rambo - A manly figure

Sister -Often used by Machis while Approching Figures for the first time

Songi -Lazy

Saanthu pottu - Possibility of getting beaten by a stick (courtesy Movie: Thevar Magan)

Takkar figure - Semma figure

Thanni - Liquor

Thalaivar - Leader

Tin katrathu - Getting into trouble (courtesy Movie: Anjali)

Ushar pakri- Smart pakri

Vennai - Fruit

Weightaana figure - A very attractive/rich figure

Wrong kaatrathu - Acting indifferently



Regards

Pistha